Shrieking violets
by Kuroi Diamond
Summary: The bizarre and intriguing days of Albert Wesker as a young man, as told by himself. Affectionately known as 'When Wesker and Humor Combine.'
1. Amelia and Yanni

When you're one of the world's most talented viral researchers, it stands to reason that the company you keep should be somewhat eccentric. But you probably weren't counting on a highly-strung psychiatrist girlfriend and her former child-soldier pal…

For Albert Wesker, things are about to go from ugly to hideous.

A/N: _Please give it a chance! I know everyone hates original characters, but I promise like I have never promised before YOU WILL NOT BE DISSAPOINTED!_

* * *

I knew there must have been some point in our relationship when things simply stopped making sense and I was no longer in control. What really made me uneasy was that I had failed to notice it at its time of occurrence and it had only in fact come to my attention when I burst into the kitchen with the heart-felt words "I've come here to kill you" and she replied with "sit down, shut up and have a cookie."

Something, I suspected at that point, was desperately not right.

That woman… She really was a maddening excuse for a female. I was so shocked by her words that there was really only one thing for me to do… And that was to sit down, shut up and have a cookie.

I am the first to admit that I probably looked as ridiculous as I felt; someone of my calibre sitting at a kitchen table with a chocolate chip cookie in his hand and a frown on his face… Not half as threatening as originally intended, I know.

The most annoying thing was that she sat there for a full minute, calmly sipping her tea, before she decided to grace me with her words.

"Now.' She said, setting her cup down on the table "I'm sensing a little hostility here…"

Oh, are you now? I wonder where you're deducing that from!

"… And I think we can mutually agree that that just isn't healthy, correct?" She stared me in the eye until I broke away, looking down at the table with a pathetic, sulky nod of the head.

"Good. I think the problem is a fair bit of pent-up aggression. Now would you say you've taken care of some of that with your little outburst?" She stared at me again and this time I just glared back at her. She smiled.

"Good. So let's get to the root of the problem, shall we? Aggression doesn't come from nowhere, obviously, so I think it would be a good idea to discuss what's causing it.' She leant forward across the table, her posture open in that "I'm your friend" way they'd taught her at shrink-school.

"Now, Albert, anything you'd like to share?"

There was silence. I wanted to say yes, there was. I wanted to share with her the way I planned to bash her head against the table until she stopped moving, or perhaps how she was just a little too close to the cutlery draw for her own safety, but somehow, and this embarrasses me no end, I gave her exactly what she wanted. I was certain the words upon my tongue were those of threats and violence, but somehow they came out just a little differently…

"I don't like the way you're always so close to him."

… Alright, so a lot differently.

She stared at me for a moment and I thought that perhaps for a moment, she was actually giving my words some thought… That for once she actually _understood_ me…

She burst out laughing.

I should _really _learn not to get my hopes up with Amelia. For a shrink in training, she really is exceedingly insensitive.

There are many ways you could describe Amelia Jakowski, and a lot of the times I try, I use a lot of four-letter words they don't teach you to spell in school.

If you want to remain PG-rated about it, you could say that she is simply insane, but to be more accurate, I will say that she is ostentatious, beautiful and too damned smart for her own good. She also has a rather off-colour sense of humour that I don't care to go into much… Since I'm usually the one she is making wisecracks about.

She's also my girlfriend; if you're wondering why exactly it is that I want to kill her for being too close to another man.

I hope you're satisfied with that.

Amelia has dark, straight hair that falls to her shoulders and she usually wears it pulled back. She also has blue eyes that can either look cruel or innocent, depending on whom she is cross-examining at the time. Her skin is pale and blemish-free, but can go a rather interesting shade of tomato-red if you manage to piss her off (which really isn't that hard. Not a great personality trait in a shrink, really.)

Truthfully, she is the kind of woman I have spent most of my life trying to avoid. Selfish and damnably quick-witted, she's danger in a Ralph Lauren suit.

Unfortunately, she has certain charms and can be an entertaining companion. She even manages to be calming if she's in the right mood.

She isn't perfect… But for now, she'll do. As bad as that sounds, I am almost certain she thinks exactly the same about me.

Anyway…

Amelia's laughter subsided and I glared at her. Between weak giggles, she managed to get out something legible;

"Al… He's like my brother. Of _course _I'm close to him!"

Alright. Granted. But siblings are seldom _that _close unless they are Siamese twins…

"That doesn't mean you always have to make him priority in your life, Amelia.' I said, drumming my fingers on the table "As much as it may shock you, I wouldn't be entirely opposed to spending more time with you." Amelia smiled.

"I know, Al. But until we can set him up with a job or something, he's going to need me to be there for him." She turned her enormous blue eyes to me with a pleading look. I'm fairly certain she was just putting it on to get her own way, but I couldn't be bothered arguing. Honestly, I was feeling a little wary after my initial outburst.

"Fine… I understand. Are we still on for lunch tomorrow?" I was willing to put the issue behind me and go home…

"Sure. Oh, can Yanni come? The interview got rescheduled for Monday."

…

Quite an irritating thing when the person you rely on to get you laid insists on bringing their so-called "brother" on dates with them.

"And we'll have to be gone by one o'clock. I'm taking him to get his hair cut."

... Quite irritating, indeed.

* * *

My name is Albert Wesker. I am twenty three years old and am currently employed by the Umbrella Corporation. As much as I would enjoy the thrill of talking about that, it belongs in an entirely different memoir.

This journal is about me… And the people I know.

Hopefully, it shall never fall into the wrong hands. Not because it would disclose any horrible secrets of Umbrella but because I would prefer not to be the laughing stock of the world that I someday hope to change.

That would be most inconvenient.

_-A. W_

* * *

When I arrived home, I was unnerved by the sight of a glass sitting on the kitchen table. It looked lonely, without so much as a salt-shaker to keep it company, but that wasn't what unnerved me;

It contained a thin, liquid substance that was yellowish in colour. It could have been white wine or apple juice or even, god forbid, a urine sample. That was all I really knew about that glass of suspicious liquid. I picked it up to study it a little closer, and-

"I wouldn't do that if I were you" said a soft, haunted voice from behind me.

Of course, I dropped the glass. It fell with a loud thud, spilling its mystery contents all over my nice brushed wood table. I spun around and glared at the slight figure lurking behind me.

"Yanni.' I growled "How many times do I have to tell you _not _to do that?" the curly haired teen just glanced at the glass and the pool of spreading liquid before turning his dark gaze back to me.

"That's why I wouldn't have done that." He said ignoring me. I rolled my eyes.

"What the hell is this stuff anyway?' I asked, prodding the glass "Urine?" Yanni took the glass carefully.

"No. This is gasoline."

…

I took a step back "Did you really say that the glass is full of...?" Yanni just stared at me and I backed away from the table.

"_Are you mad_? Why would you put _gasoline_ in a _kitchen?_" I yelled and Yanni very pointedly looked at the stove and then the clock.

"Where you trying to blow me up?" I continued and Yanni once again looked at the stove. I paused.

"… Of course you were trying to blow me up." I murmured and Yanni nodded once.

"You arrived earlier than I expected. I didn't have time to place it where I intended." He it said very matter-of-factly. I just stared at him.

"Better luck next time." He said to himself and left the room, quiet as a ghost.

I sat down hard on a kitchen stool.

"I _really _hate that kid." I muttered.

Let me tell you a little about Yanni Grigorovich. Jewish given name, Russian surname. Distinct possibility of being neither nationality.

Yanni is seventeen. The attraction to explosive substances and the ability to sneak up on people (usually resulting in their necks being broken) comes from the fact that from age nine, Yanni was a child soldier. Before that, he was being trained to be one and before that… Well, one can only assume he was sacrificed to the wolves in the form of Guerrilla leaders by parents no doubt looking to make some easy money or more likely, just looking to be rid of the little monster.

Amelia has told me this sad little tale time and time again, usually going on and on about it being the cause of his anti-social nature, his unnatural silence, and his general lack of being human. Of course, she doesn't mention that last one. I added that based on personal opinion.

What she has never told me is what it has to do with his fascination with ending my life, which believe it or not, is rather closely endeared to me_. _Of course, this doesn't matter as I have already figured it out. And it doesn't have anything to do with his past…

No, the direct cause of young Mr. Grigorovich's unrelenting attempts to kill me just so happens to be Amelia herself. And their relationship. And her relationship with me.

Amelia is my girlfriend and Yanni is her best friend. As a psychology major, Amelia was given Yanni as her first… Mental case. A practise, if you will. Apparently, you're not supposed to form 'strong' emotional attachments to your patients, but Amelia is after all, female.

One look into Yanni's enormous (deranged) brown eyes and she just had to take him home. Like a puppy. Albeit a puppy that could kill you in five hundred different ways without the aid of his numerous concealed weapons… And he'd make it look like an accident.

Sometimes I worry that Amelia, highly-strung as she is, would look deep into Ted Bundy's eyes and think "I can save him." Other times I think she'd look deep into his eyes and promptly stab them out with her immaculate French manicure.

I'm not sure which one I worry about more.

The woman herself is far too insane to be a shrink, but it's what she's always wanted to be. These days, she spends her time trying to coax Grigorovich out of his shell and into some kind of comfortable paid profession. Presumably one that doesn't involve guns, knives, grenades and as far as I can hope, Gasoline.

What Amelia fails to realise is that as the first female in Yanni's life (or at the very least, the first attractive one who is actually _nice _to him) he is absolutely, completely and irreversibly in love with her. And I, the boyfriend, am in the way of what the hormonal boy killer sees as being their perfect life together.

So admittedly, yes. He was in her life at least three years before I showed up but the boy had all that time to make his move. So what if he's socially inept? It isn't my fault he is without the skills to make people understand what he feels. The boy hardly speaks in the first place. And yes, I did realise his devotion to the woman the second I met him… But I wasn't going to let that stop me from asking her out to dinner and a movie and then back to my apartment for the night… Poor scamp probably went wild when she didn't come back until morning…

Look. I'm not the bad guy here. Lest we forget he's trying to kill _me, _not the other way around. What? Isn't that enough for you? Fine. I genuinely don't care what you think. I'm not the one at fault here and that's that.

Anyway…

You're probably wondering just what he was doing in my home. Well… Amelia isn't that blind when it comes to Yanni. Though she utterly ignores my attempts to make her believe he wants me dead, it is clear to her that we don't get along.

Amelia's brilliant solution? That Yanni comes and lives with me for three months.

Oh yes. A magnificent time we are having indeed. Especially me. I know the only reason we are both going along with it is to make her happy. But Yanni, ever the proactive one, seems to feel it is his duty to make sure I am dead before our happy little time together is through.

I don't want to get along with him either. But it's not like I can casually invite him to Arklay with me and hand him over to Will as a test subject. If anything happens to Yanni, I don't really see Amelia coping. Yanni seems to feel she can cope without me, however…

So there you have it. That is why I, Albert Wesker; brilliant junior researcher for the Umbrella Corporation, have come to have a psychotic, highly trained young killer as my houseguest. It truly is times like these that I look upon my life and think; why?

Why can't I just kill everyone?

* * *

-_A. W_

Yes? What do you think? Is it good, is it bad? Is it destined for the fiery pits of doom where forever more sharp pitchforks shall be jabbed into its proverbial backside for its sheer incompetence as a work of fan fiction? I will let you tell me if it deserves to be finished or not.

(Please don't condemn it to the pit, though. I really did try…)

-KD

PS: _To be entirely specific, am I doing Wesker right? I'm trying to write him as he may have been when he was younger, so you're not allowed to say "Wesker wouldn't say that!" Unless he REALLY wouldn't say it. Like in that Perry novel when he says "I've got a hard-on like you wouldn't believe."_

* * *


	2. William and Annette

AN: _This story takes place in early January of 1984. Alexia has been "killed" by this point in the timeline but Sherry has not yet been born to Annette and William who aren't yet married. The Nemesis project is not fully under way and Wesker is considering leaving research for Intelligence Services, but has not yet transferred and will not for another few years. In his remaining time as a researcher, he will find out the T-Virus can infect almost anything given the right circumstances, but you probably won't hear about it in this story. _:)

_Oh… And Solomon? Not Annette's real maiden name… I made that up._

* * *

"Morning Albert" Says Will, barely glancing up from his microscope. Some people would find this terribly impolite but Will is the kind of man willing to sacrifice manners for efficiency. I am used to this, having worked with the man for the past six years. He is quiet, hard-working and brilliant; the ideal workmate really.

Oh, William has his flaws. For one thing, any threat to his ego is treated with child-like sulking. He is a baby after all, becoming Umbrella's top researcher at the age of sixteen. However, despite aging six years, he can still act like a toddler if you say the wrong thing to him. Mention a problem with his work and you'll be treated first to him pouting at you, then to him storming off to the lab and then to a three-thousand word report on your desk in the morning detailing why you were wrong and there was no such problem in the first place.

If you really want to enrage him, mention the recently belated Alexia Ashford…

However, Will isn't without maturity at all. He continues an ongoing relationship with Annette Solomon, a fellow researcher, and certainly has none of the problems I have with Amelia. At least William and Annette manage to be fanatical about the same things…

I sat down, sighing. I had barely slept the previous night because I suspected the little cretin down the hall was building some kind of explosive device to set where I'd least expect it… Even though after a month and a half of living with him I now suspected everywhere. I couldn't believe I had to suffer him through lunch too.

Will looked up for a second, I registered a flash of blue as his eyes fixed on mine for a brief second and he was back to his microscope again. However, this time he spoke as he worked;

"Let me guess… Amelia, Yanni or both?"

I smiled. Will rarely offers opinions on personal matters, not being all that interested in people, but for some reason Amelia and the boy killer seem to amuse him slightly. Not that he would ever let it on.

"Both.' I said "He continues his attempts to kill me and Amelia continues to not believe me."

"Kill him right back." Will said it without a hint of humour in his voice. A strange habit that leads most people to believe he never makes jokes. Granted, he rarely does, but there is the odd occasion when he will offer something in a voice so monotonous it takes you a minute to realise he is being humorous.

But you should never laugh when you do get it. William doesn't like loud noises…

"I would, Will.' I murmured, crumpling an old lab report and throwing it in the trash "But Amelia would be heartbroken and that's simply too much hassle for me right now."

"You could get her a new one.' He said "I'm sure there are plenty of Russian-Jewish ex-child soldiers lying around." I frowned at him.

"Sarcasm does not help me, William." Two jokes in one day… It was almost unheard of from him. I knew then that something good must have happened to him. Admittedly, he had cheered up since the death of Alexia, the child genius and Will's rival. I know, a rivalry with a child; stupid. But undoubtedly, William's greatest sin is his pride… "Tell me, has something good befallen you?"

And he smiled. I almost jumped out of my chair. I don't think in all my years here at Arklay I have ever seen even a semblance of a mouth twitch from the man and here he was with a full-blown smile on his face.

"Well… I asked Annette to marry me, if you insist on knowing." The smile was gone as soon as it had appeared. I wonder now if it was ever really there in the first place or a hallucination caused by my lack of sleep…

"Oh… Well, congratulations." I mumbled. That's what you were supposed to say in that situation, right? When your best friend is going to marry you are supposed to express some form of happiness despite the fact that it actually has nothing to do with you…

"She hasn't said yes yet." He murmured absently, twisting the focus on his microscope "She asked for some time to think about it…" He wrote down something on a pad in his messy, incomprehensible scrawl and I frowned.

"Surely then you have nothing to smile about. I was under the impression that a situation like that would make the best of us decidedly nervous." I commented and William gave the ghost of a shrug.

"She won't say no. I know she won't…" He said. I could tell that he was no longer interested in the conversation but I couldn't help pressing him. I was curious, after all.

"Has your IQ gotten so high you can read minds now?" I asked. The mind of a woman, I had learnt, was too complex a thing for any man to delve into. If William had figured out a way, I was keen to learn.

"No. I just know her well enough.' He looked up and held eye contact with me for once "We both know it's the right step to take. You and Amelia will too someday. Provided she doesn't break up with you first." He kept staring at me and I held his gaze. A slightly uncomfortable silence descended over us for a long time before I had a sudden thought and asked;

"Why do you think she'd be the one to break up with me?"

* * *

Three hours later I was banging my head against a wall. I felt a little sorry for it, but it would live… In a vague sense of the word.

Amelia had very kindly called me to inform me that I would not be seeing her for lunch. Though I was happy it meant I wouldn't have to force small-talk with Yanni, I was angry that it was his fault I wouldn't be seeing her in the first place. Apparently he was in one of his clingy, limit-like moods that day and just couldn't get in the mood to go out…

I hate him.

"Al…?"

I turned around to see Annette staring at me. I suppose it isn't everyday you see somebody repetitively let their head connect with a wall on purpose, but I simply was not in the mood to explain it to her. I smoothed my lab coat and took a calming breath.

"Hello Annette. Don't mind that… It's irrelevant.'

She raised an eyebrow so I quickly asked her how she was. It seemed to make her forget about the bloodstain on the wall behind me, but she frowned.

"Not so great, actually…" She replied. She sat down at William's unoccupied desk and sighed "He asked me to marry him." I decided not to reveal that William had already told me. Something about the look on her face.

"Really? What did you say?" I asked, sitting down at my own desk. Annette shook her head.

"I asked him for some time to think about it…' She whispered. I felt a slight feeling of urgency in my gut telling me to run, run from that room and not ask another thing. Ever. Dealing with female emotions is not exactly a forte of mine, despite the fact that I get enough practise with Amelia's volatility.

"Uh" I said and cringed. It wasn't even a real word, for god's sake! I cleared my throat and tried again "If you don't mind me asking… Are you going to say yes?" She looked up at me, her blue eyes wide.

"I don't know, Al!' she said desperately "I want to… My god, I want to. But…" She trailed off and looked away. She slumped forward a little in her seat before she spoke again.

"Ok. This is really embarrassing but Will is the first boyfriend I've had since high school.' She said flatly. I found myself wondering how on earth that was relevant and she rolled her eyes, obviously registering the confusion on my face.

"Al, I'm twenty one. I'm barely old enough to drink legally and now I have to decide if I'm going to get married? I've not really done anything with my life yet.' She stared at me "And I've barely done anyone either."

I hate to admit that I blushed slightly. The woman was being rather unexpectantly forthright. I looked away and cleared my throat again.

"I… Think you should probably talk to William about this, Annette." I said and then froze as I felt her hand on my shoulder. I looked up into her face and saw the intensity of her gaze.

"Al… If I marry him now, I might never get to do all the things I've planned to do…' I remained petrified as her arms encircled my neck and she slid down onto my lap "I've always been curious about… What you'd be like." She whispered in my ear.

I considered the following; my best friend's girlfriend was straddling my lap in a room that no doubt any minute the aforementioned best friend would return to. Should he return at the current moment, said friend would be confronted by the sight of his girlfriend straddling the lap of his supposed best friend. I was being reliably informed my brain that if he were to see this scene, there was a distinct chance that our friendship would be immediately terminated by way of my death…

I had to act fast.

I formulated my plan into two phases. Phase one: disentangle self from the clutches of one very aroused-looking Annette Solomon. Phase two: flee.

The perfect plan. Or it would have been. Except that when I tried to move, Annette ended up… Err, _grinding _against a certain area and I suddenly couldn't help remembering that I hadn't gotten any for a good three weeks. I am sorry to say that the thought arising in my head wasn't the only thing that was doing so at that point, but I will share with you what it was;

Damn.

* * *

This is so typical of me; "Him, her, him, him and her are the important characters of this story. And now that that's all cleared up it's time for the PORN!" XD

Erm… I'm only half-serious.

Sorry it's under two thousand words this time around, I just figured it was too good of a cliff-hanger to waste, but don't worry. I have the next chapter planned already.

A word on the title, 'Shrieking Violets' you know a Shrinking Violet is a really shy person, right? Well, you know how absolutely nobody in this entire story is shy? Yeah, there you go. Also, shrinking = shrink, like what Amelia is. So 'shrieking' is a play on the word 'shrink' and corresponds with the mayhem that this story has within it.

I'm glad we could clear that up.


	3. From one problem to another

_I guess part of the reason I am writing this story is that I'm sick of people thinking Wesker is one of two extremes; either cold or pure evil._

_So first of all, Wesker is NOT cold. You should be able to tell that by the way he laughs like a maniac when things are going right. He also gets absolutely FURIOUS when it comes to Chris… And I think he thinks he is witty. He is a very passionate man and won't let things get in his way. Ever._

_That brings me to the whole evil thing. I highly doubt Satan was his father or he was just born evil. Wesker doesn't go around raping people just because or beating the fuck out of people for kicks (excuse the pun.) There is reason to his rhyme. Rhyme being in this case the fucking up of people mentally and physically if they get in his way…_

_What people, and even Wesker seem to forget, is the fact that he is ultimately human. Even after he gets all viral on our collective ass, he doesn't stop with the human emotions._

_I aim to show Wesker as I feel he actually is… Or was, at least. Thanks for your support._

* * *

I essentially crawled into the house and shut the door. I was tired. _Extremely _tired. But not for the reason you are no doubt thinking of.

No. As I can tell you're curious, I suppose I may as well explain exactly what happened…

So… I was sitting in my chair, pinned to it by Annette as she straddled my lap. The situation was becoming dire as she leaned in and gently bit my ear lobe. I knew that I had to shake off the lust and silence the stupid testosterone-filled urge to mate right then and there with the warm female before me.

Stupid urge…

"A… Annette.' I said and it came out entirely the wrong way. I had to change my tone… "Annette." I said it more firmly and she pulled back, thankfully (or perhaps regrettably) stopped her lascivious ministrations on my ear.

"What?" She asked, eyes filled with confusion.

I wasn't exactly sure how one went about trying to lose the attention of a _very _interested woman (who happens to be one's best friend's girlfriend) without hurting her already fragile feelings. I was very much caught between a rock and a hard place… But I'm not even going to get started on the things that were 'hard' at that point…

Anyway… Where was I before I so rudely interrupted myself? Ah, right...

"Look Annette,' I said, gently pushing her off me "it's not that I'm not interested…' I coughed and crossed my legs "I'm _very _interested, but you're William's girlfriend and I've got Amelia…" I inwardly groaned as tears welled up in her eyes.

"I know…' she whispered "I-I'm sorry. I made a mistake…" She turned to leave and on a stupid, _stupid _impulse I grabbed her arm. The look in her eyes was so hopeful I wanted to smash my head against my desk a few times just for causing it.

"Uh… Annette. I'd be… I'd be a very lucky man.' I said slowly as I let go of her arm "But I'd only be a lucky man for a short while. If you marry William, he gets to be a lucky man for the rest of his life."

Annette blinked and a blush spread across her cheeks.

"You really think that?" She asked and I nodded.

"I do. And besides, William _needs _you. There isn't another woman alive who could make him feel the way you do.' My eyes slid to William's desk; its top spread with countless papers and files "Not even the most brilliant of us can stand to be lonely, Annette."

"He needs me…" Annette murmured. I could see she was thinking it over and struggled to my feet (the god-awful tightness of my pants made it difficult, in case you are wondering… And I dearly hope you are not.)

"He does." I assured her, my voice firm. I very gently brushed a tear away as it threatened to roll down her cheek. Annette suddenly gave me a dazzling smile and I briefly wondered if that was why William had fallen for her in the first place…

I just managed to avoid jumping back as she hugged me. I was stiff and uncomfortable before I realised there was nothing sexual in it and hugged her back the way a friend would. (Meaning I kept my groin region well separated from hers.)

"Thank you, Al… Really." She whispered in my ear and pulled back. At that very moment, Will came through the door. I saw a vague look of curiosity cross his face before his blue eyes flickered to his girlfriend.

"Annette, why are y-"

His words were cut off as Annette crossed the room in two short strides and without hesitation, pressed her lips to his. I could well imagine the surprise in his eyes and the blush that would look so out of place on his pale, pale face. Annette pulled back and beamed at him.

"Yes." She whispered that single word and disappeared out the door.

William stood absolutely still. His eyes were focussed in my direction, but I don't think he was really seeing anything at that moment. This continued for a long time before he snapped out of his daze walked over to his desk, sitting down to resume his work.

I thought perhaps I should leave him alone for a while, not sure if he wanted company. I got half-way to the door before he spoke up;

"May I ask…' he said softly "what you said to her?" Once again, he was not looking at me as he spoke. I swallowed noisily and shook my head, even though he couldn't see. After a moment of waiting without an answer, William turned around and fixed me with his brilliant blue stare. I could see the ghost of a smile on his face.

_I guess he does know how after all…_

As I walked out the door, I thought I heard William say something else. I turned but once again, the man was nose-deep in his research.

I'll never be sure… But it sounded like he said 'thank you.'

-

Anyway… After I managed to get into the house, I considered simply sleeping in the hallway, but I wasn't about to give Yanni an excuse to step on me.

I dragged myself into the kitchen, assuring myself that some sugar would surely alleviate my fatigue and prepare me for the enormous amount of paperwork I had to fill out. Opening the cupboard, I reached for the Reeses' Peanut butter cups…

Let me quickly stop right now to say, yes, I do realise that my "weakness" as Amelia puts it, for that one type of candy is out of place with the image you have no doubt formed of me in your head. Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I can't be listening to opera or discussing quadratic equations 24/7. Even I need to keep up my blood sugar levels. Therefore, I absolutely _forbid _you from sniggering.

So. I reached for the Peanut butter cups, hoping for a quick sugar fix… And frowned when my fingers brushed only air. I looked into the back of the cupboard and they weren't there either. I blinked…

And growled.

"Yanni…"

All teenagers, even the ones capable of mass-murder it seems, are sugar junkies. But that didn't mean I was any less pissed off at the lack of sweet confections available to me after a hard day on the job.

I stormed to the guest bedroom (even after a month and a half, I refused to call it Yanni's) and swinging open the door… Stopped. And my jaw dropped open.

Yanni appeared to be asleep and lay on his bed, facing away from me. The boy was almost naked, save for boxer shorts. This isn't, of course, what caused my jaw to drop (what the hell do you take me for? Honestly…) No, what caused the sudden lengthening of my face was Yanni's equally almost-naked bed partner, a female he just so happened to have his arm wrapped around.

For a brief moment, I was about to close the door and walk away with a muttered apology if I had woken them when I realised that there was no way Yanni had the social skills to entice a woman into his bed.

In fact… There was only one female I knew of who would ever willing touch the murderous little child…

"AMELIA!"

* * *

There appears to be so much CHEATING in this story… But I assure you, it's not what it looks like.

(Probably)

I'm leaving you on a cliffy because it's a good place for one. I'm afraid you must learn to live with that horrible habit of mine. Even though it's short… I know. However, I already know what happens in the next chapter. I'm not just making it up as I go along.


	4. From one problem to a resolution

"Al! Wait, it's not what you think!" Amelia cried as I grabbed Yanni and flung him against the wardrobe. It fell on top of him, effectively trapping him between it and the floor. I'm not entirely sure even that was enough to wake him up; the boy had a reputation of being an incredibly deep sleeper. However, he wasn't really the one I was worrying about right then…

I turned my attention to Amelia, noting the fear in her eyes.

"It's… It's really not how it looks…" She whispered. I just grabbed her wrist and tugged her off the bed. She struggled as I proceeded to drag her down the hallway to the front door. I opened it, tossed her outside and slammed it shut in her face.

"Al? Al!' she cried, her voice muted behind the door "Don't do this! What about my clothes?"

Oh, that's right. She was stuck out there in her underwear. Well, if walking home almost naked was what it took to make her understand what comes to those who cross me, I was more than willing to let it happen.

I ignored her yelling and threatening me from behind the door and walked into the kitchen, thinking perhaps I would make myself a cup of coffee. I'd just taken a mug down from the shelf when the phone rang. I grabbed it off the hook.

"_What?_" I growled into it and then cringed as a furious female voice assaulted my ear;

"Albert Wesker, don't you _DARE_ hang up on me!"

I blinked "Amelia?' I asked "where are you calling from?"

"Mr. Grayson's, across the hall.' She said through her teeth and then lowered her voice "Hurry up and let me back in, he's _staring _at me…" She sounded panicked.

"That's nice." I said and hung up the phone, wondering if I should make my coffee with or without creamer…

The phone rang again and I ignored it, putting a new filter in the coffee machine. Five minutes later, as I was pouring myself a steaming cup of the caffeinated beverage, I heard the sound of the door opening violently and colliding with the wall.

I sighed. I wasn't looking forward to explaining to the superintendent that there were holes in his building because my seething girlfriend couldn't be bothered opening a door gently.

Said seething girlfriend (soon to be ex-girlfriend, I thought) now stood in my kitchen, a look of pure rage on her face. I noted she was wearing one of Mr. Grayson's aging pull-overs. The smell of old tobacco and mothballs was rather over-powering.

"The old man look suits you.' I commented, sipping my coffee "Tell me, before I throw you out again, how did you manage to get back in?" Amelia slammed a hand down on the table so hard; my coffee mug jumped an inch in the air.

"I got the key from the super, you bastard…' She hissed "He wouldn't give it to me unless I let him fondle my boobs!" Amelia shook with rage and I looked at her disdainfully.

"And I suppose you let him?" I said and she stared, speechless with rage. Simply quivering slightly. Like very angry jello.

"No, I did not _LET HIM_!' She practically screamed at me "He's lying in his doorway unconscious because I hit him with a pot plant!" I shrugged.

"Ah, my mistake. I simply assumed you weren't opposed to letting other men touch you." I mused and Amelia looked slightly hurt.

"Al… Look, if I didn't give a damn about you, I wouldn't have risked getting groped and having assault charges laid against me to get back in here.' She said softly "I want you to listen to me so I can explain it to you." I gripped my mug tightly.

I honestly did not know if Amelia was worth all the trouble. I had liked her up until that point, certainly. But if that was the kind of thing she planned to put me through on a day-to-day basis, I was fairly content for our relationship to end right then. However, she had sounded at least vaguely sincere…

"You may have a minute of my time." I said, already certain anything she told me would be perfectly unbelievable. It didn't matter to me if she left then or in a minute. So long as she eventually left.

"Ok… Can I put my clothes on first?" She said, already moving towards the door.

"No." I replied.

Amelia looked shocked "Al!"

"You have 45 seconds, Amelia." I said glancing at my watch and her mouth dropped open. She kept staring dumbly as I took another sip of coffee and sighed "40 seconds…" She blinked once and then jumped into action. Or rather, into talking.

"Ok Al. Since you're going to be that way about it; what you saw was not what you thought it was. It was only designed to look like that. It's an intimacy experiment I wanted to try-"

My eye twitched

"-to help Yanni. I figured if he got a girlfriend, it would be step in the right direction for him. But he has this fear of intimacy and I didn't want him to get a girlfriend and then suplex her the first time she tries to touch him. The experiment was just to show him there was nothing to be afraid of. We didn't kiss or anything. Just lie together… And I guess he fell asleep. He has a really tight grip and all that… But anyway, I would never do that to you, I like what we have.' She gently placed her hand over mine and looked into my eyes "Please don't throw it away on a silly misunderstanding."

I was silent as I looked back at her, knowing that she was telling the truth. My anger at her had faded slightly, but my absolute rage at Yanni had not. I knew he was not the type to just 'fall asleep.' He'd almost certainly done it on purpose to sabotage us.

I knew then that however much I wanted to; I simply could not break up with Amelia. If I did it, Yanni would feel as if he won and that I was not willing to let happen. It may seem bitter, and I won't deny that it probably is, but at that moment my decision was simply down to the fact that my hate for Yanni far out-weighed my desire to break up with Amelia.

"So…' I said, entwining my fingers with Amelia's "Intimacy, you say…?" She immediately looked suspicious.

"You're letting it go just like that?" She asked, frowning.

"No.' I snapped "I am not _just letting it go_.' I leaned in close to her ear and whispered "There are a few things I would rather like you to try to make up for the trauma I've been put through…"

Amelia pulled back a bit and for a moment looked at me as if I'd gone insane, but then smiled.

"God, you're weird." She said, her arms encircling my neck. I let my hands travel down her back and then scooped her into my arms. I carried her to my room and deposited her on the bed before I took a little trip down the hall to Yanni's room…

"Yanni." I said.

"_What?_" Came the snarled reply from beneath the wardrobe.

"Amelia and I will be busy for a while… Perhaps the entire night. Please, make sure you don't disturb us." I said, not bothering to keep the smugness from my voice.

As I shut the door on his angry growls and violent thrashing about, I contemplated my day; it had started off quite exhausting and stressful, without a single thing going my way. Annette hadn't exactly helped with my being sexually pent-up either. And Yanni had stolen my candy.

However, as I sauntered away from the no doubt very enraged and uncomfortable boy, towards my room where my half-naked girlfriend awaited on the bed, I couldn't help thinking that my day had somehow ended up not being half bad…

_A.W_

* * *

Hahaha, Amelia thinks she won. Well, I suppose she does get laid, but that's not the point. She let's herself be deluded far too easily… Like how she refuses to notice that Yanni is trying to kill Wesker.

You know, I think it's so very much like Wesker just to keep somebody around to spite someone else. Especially if that someone is a person he hates.

But it doesn't matter what I think. It matters what YOU think.

So tell me, what DO you think? :D

-KD


End file.
